Balance and Sacrifices

School, work, family, friends and love life... It just feels like I've too many things on my plate and there's no way I can pick one without neglecting another. It's tough because you know that whatever you choose to prioritise, there'd always be at least one person who would tell you otherwise.

For example, when I hang out too much with my friends, I may tend to forsake my education, and when I channel all my energy to my studies and work life, I feel like it's impossible to step into a relationship. Also, commitment to a relationship naturally means that I'll spend lesser time left for my family.

You know what's the biggest problem? It's wanting to perform well in everything you choose to do. I'm an extremist and if I want to do something, I'd put my heart and soul to it; It's pretty pointless to do something half-heartedly. Which is why one of the things I find really hard to cope with as I grow older, is actually finding a balance in life.

In life, you either give up, give in or give it your all. Right?

What should you sacrifice and what should you keep close to you?

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Currently in my life, I'm going through this huge crisis on how to separate my time properly and to make the right choices. It's extremely hard though.

School sucks all my time up - So during my break, I'd either be doing my work or catching up on the sleep I've been missing up on. By then all my energy is drained, which makes things so much more difficult cause I have to decide how I want to allocate that minimal amount of time left. To watch my favourite tv series, to read the crazy amount of books I bought (which I left to collect dust), to have a meal with my family, to go shopping or to spend it with my love ones.

HOW DO I DECIDE?!

I feel unhappy sometimes because everyone expects something out of me, and it's really impossible to please everyone. What everyone does is to demand, demand and complain that you're not doing ENOUGH, but never have they considered what you've ALREADY DONE for them.

Eventually, the things you love become the things you dread doing. Your passion turns into a chore. Even if I gave you $50 to study the subject you hate most in school, it just becomes a motivation, but you'll not do it with utmost sincerity. On the other hand, if I gave you $50 to stop doing what you love, you'd rather not accept my money.

It's tiring and I have no idea how I'm gonna have a balance in my life. I've too many things I wanna prioritise, and it's tough to make a sacrifice.

Every morning, I just wake up feeling like I owe everyone an explanation for the decisions I make. And as easy as it is to just say, "Just lead your life the way you want, you don't owe anyone an explanation" it's not the same when you've to apply this to the people you care for and the people who care for you.

I've never been this bothered about something before, cause it seems like no one ever tries to stand in my position to understand how I feel.

I'd like to say that I've a solution to this, but fact is I don't. I'm still trying, but it's hard if nobody's willing compromise. Life is all about making the right choices, but what if you don't know what's the right decision to make?

What's worse is when you know someone or something's not the best choice, but it's all that you ever wanted.

Everyone judges the choices you make, but no one ever considers the reasons behind why you decide to choose a certain path.

What would you do if it's you? To follow your mind, or to follow what your heart says?

I probably don't need a wallet.

For those of you who don't know, I'm a HUGE shopaholic, and my hard-earned money vanishes into thin air at the speed of light. Most of my money are either spent on clothes, otherwise cab. I take a cab at least twice a day and that's why the cash in my pocket runs out really quickly. And now that school has started, the nearest ATM from my school requires quite a bit of a walk... Even worse.

Every single day we’re spending money, buying this, paying that. Ever had a long queue waiting behind you while you dig for loose change at a convenience store? Or forget to bring your wallet out and have to walk back in the scorching sun just to get it? It happens so often for me cause I’m really forgetful.

So I know I’m a little little slow, but I recently heard of this new app called Dash. Since taking a cab is a norm for me, it also came to my mind that I’ve been seeing the Dash sign on nearly every cab I hopped on the past few weeks. I’ve also seen the same sign while shopping at places like Topshop, Miss Selfridge, Dorothy Perkins and Watsons. They have those little tags on the counter with the Dash logo and a counter number. 

Furthermore, I overheard a lady queuing in front of me at Watsons that she wanted to pay by Dash. It got me a little curious as to what “paying by Dash” means. Anyway, few days ago, came my friend's experience with Dash. I was craving for Koi while accompanying my friend to run some errands during our 15min class break. We both didn’t have our wallets with us and my friend suggested she pay with Dash and I was shocked she knew about it too.

She happily shared with me how Dash works. I thought it was quite interesting how we could make cashless & cardless payments, even though I was pretty skeptical as usual as she went on and on about how she really likes it.

Basically after witnessing how it was being used, the concept of Dash is that you just need your phone to make transactions. Yeap, it's really as simple as it sounds.

I went online to do a little research and I found out that Dash is a new app by Singtel and Standard Chartered. The website states that Dash is an update to money and that us users can directly download cash into our phone.

Why Dash appealed to me is because I really LOVE having everything on my phone. From calendar events to photo filters, I practically have everything stored in this little device of mine.

I also really hate having a super heavy wallet cause of all the loose change I get when buying food in school. And the hassle of going to an ATM which is so inaccessible from school.

Now, I can throw these worries aside and just whip out my phone every time I need to pay for my cab ride, shopping or food.

It's actually quite amazing how far technology has come; perhaps soon our wallets are not even needed. Haha.

Don’t you guys also hate it when your friend borrows money from you and think it's okay to keep using the same excuses to not return it? Especially the most common "reason" like, "Oh I don't have cash with me now." It really gets on my nerves, but now I can just get them to swipe the money back to me with Dash. Sucks to be you. :p

Anyway, I haven't really tried out the entire app yet and I would love to soon. I've just signed up for it a couple of weeks back and to my surprise, I received a $10 credit for FREE, which I thought was rather a good strategy to get us kiasu Singaporeans to sign up. Free stuff, why not? Can buy two cups of Koi or a few necessities from Watsons lol. Cheapskate max.

Kinda excited to try it out over the weekends cause my wardrobe seriously #needsanupdate. I NEED NEW CLOTHES!!!

If you guys are interested in finding out more about Dash, or sign up to get your $10 credited for FREE, 

visit: DASH'S WEBPAGE

Do leave a comment if you have tried Dash and let me know how you like it! 

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The problem with being a "BLOGGER" today

I know there has been a lot of drama happening recently, and this entire thing is extremely immature and has put bloggers in a really BAD LIGHT.

It got me thinking what does being a blogger even mean nowadays.

Blogger - At this rate, everyone can be a blogger... Oh wait, or should I say, everyone wants to be a blogger? Create an account, start up a blog, *BAM* you're officially self-titled a BLOGGER. #Boogerplease

Bloggers today aren't what they used to be.

I can safely say that at least 80% of the population in Singapore have this rather huge misconception that bloggers are all about taking nice OOTDs, posting superficial stuff, writing reviews and having a substantial amount of followers, getting sponsored from head to toe, bed to car. Yes, this are what bloggers do, and I things I won't deny doing as well. But IT FUCKING TAKES MORE THAN JUST THAT in order to sustain in such a competitive environment.

I've been blogging for the last 6 years, since 2008. Starting a blog with the idea in mind that I wanted to share my opinions with everyone. Never have I chose this path in hope of getting "chio" sponsored stuff, or thinking that this is the easy way out to success or fame. I was just lucky enough to have my first ever engagement in late 2011, and that was when I began blogging professionally. FYI, that means that I receive a stable income from it, and I regard it as a full-time job in all seriousness.

1) Self-proclaimed titles

It gives me goosebumps when I'm named "Superstar" or "Celebrity."

I'm not even kidding, but this irks me real bad. Whenever my peers or readers call me that, never once have I felt that I was eligible for that title. There was this one time, I was waiting for the lift at Cineleisure and a group of readers/followers approached me to ask me for a photo, that followed by a couple of tourists asking if I were a celebrity, and all I did was shook my head with diffidence and smiled with ignominy.

Of course, it'd be an honour to be addressed as one, but that should never be something one claims to be.

You can call yourself ANYTHING but whether you are OR NOT is a whole other thing.

You can have a friend with a very nice camera take a nice OOTDs for you, and add a watermark stating "photography" after their name in the picture, but that alone doesn't make you a model. 

I may not be the highest-ranking blogger in SG, but I've put in years of effort to be able to get to where I am today, and I'm definitely still NOT THE BEST. Being a blogger used to be something special to me. I used to have people coming up to me telling me how capable I am to be making more money and to have considerably high amount of followers on all my social platforms, than the people my age.

Nowadays, it's so different, we get 10 year olds who would label themselves as a blogger from owning a blog and people who think they are "the shit" from the followers they BOUGHT.

2) Professional blogger vs. "BLOGGER"

Yes indeed, as a professional blogger, I won't deny that high-paying bloggers earn much more than most freshly graduates, but just because we don't go through the "hard way" (get a proper job that requires me to work for 9 hours a day) of earning money, it doesn't mean that whatever we do is easy. 

I'm not sure about the others who blog for a living, but personally, I've been juggling between school and my career for the past 3 years.

It matters to me to write well

It matters to me to come up with content that my readers can relate to

It matters to me to be consistent and that I will never be complacent even when I'm on a roll

It matters to me that I do not succumb to the norms of society, and narrow-minded haters that expect me to cater to their likes and dislikes

It matters to me that I do not deceive my viewers by advertising things that even I don't believe in, just because I was paid to do so 

If these things do not matter to you, then you should question yourself if you're really cutout to be a blogger.

Yes, I could easily list a zillion perks of being a well-known blogger, such as - Getting recognised; C'mon it's a good feeling to have people coming up to you, making you feel you're so fucking famous. So don't bull and tell me you hate the fame or attention cos you know you're lying to yourself. And if you really hate it so much then shut down your blog and write everything in a god damn diary.

Even 1/2k followers for a "blogger" is considered high compared to an average person and some boast to their friends just to feed their ego.

Honestly, do you really think you're that cool? Cos even I don't think I'm cool, I can afford shampoo, I can afford my own clothes. There's nothing to show off about, nothing to rave on your blog all day long on how you've been sponsored this and sponsored that, if that's really all you have to say.

Yes I do get sponsors, and blog about them, but that's not the only thing that I'm concerned with and talk about.

3) Success comes to those who earn it.

It's no secret that people can rise to fame overnight. Some try extremely hard to, perhaps by starting some little drama because of their little insecurities or doing nonsensical stuff. Soon, they become the talk of the town, they trend for awhile, but whatever it is, it doesn't last. All these come and go. Even if you're good looking, as long as you don't have a strong opinion and you're following blindly with the crowd, nobody will keep up with you for long.

 In time to come, you'd die off and be replaced. There will always be another you that will come along.

To be irreplaceable, one has always gotta be different.

I've seen people who worked hard for the things they are passionate about, even when they hit rock bottom, they never fail to stand up strong. These are the people that I look up to and whom I feel we should all respect. There are still people like these who exist today, and no doubt, some of them have gained the success they've earned. I'm not saying this to convince you that I'm one of these people, but I just want you to know that that group of bloggers still exist, and if you wanna "worship" them, make sure you choose the right one to love blindly.